This is my kind of joke. So that's alright if that doesn't entertain you. But still, enjoy
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By Carissa
On the independence day, RT 54 holds an annual gathering, complete with typical independence day races and games. This has become the tradition of the neighborhood, as well as many communities in Indonesia. Leaving their houses empty, the residents join in the gathering along with their family and relatives. Soon, as everyone has gathered in the field, the event begins. Games and races start, involving not only children, yet also the much enthusiastic adults.
THE HOST: Ladies and gentlemen, don't go anywhere yet because soon, at the end of our annual gathering, we're going to hold a cracker-eating race (lomba makan kerupuk) for the adults. The race will be divided into three rounds: first is the pleminary round, second is the semi-final, and the third is the final round. BUT, this won't be an ordinary race like any other kind of races. Because, the winner will get a lot of BLACKBERRIES, courtesy of Mr. Suherman, who's kindly enough to contribute for our event.
A blackberry. No. BLACKBERRIES? As in plural? What a wow. Who doesn't want to get such a cool gadget? The most updated yet the latest one in the market people have been dying to have? And it's not just one blackberry but lots of them. It's just the host doesn't mention how many of them. But still, it's unbelievable. What would their types be? Javelyn? Curve? Bold? Actually, RT 54 is located in a rural area, so it won't be easy to achieve that kind of gadget, because the nearby city is quite far away from that neighborhood. Mr. Suherman is not even considerably rich. Maybe he's saved his money to purchase them.
Soon the adults become extremely eager and they quickly sign up to participate in the race altogether - not wanting to lose their chance to win blackberries.
With twenty adults joining, the race is on. The pleminary round passes, leaving only 8 contestants remaining to go to the next round. As the semi-final goes, 2 tough contestants are left to go to the final one: Mr. Darsono and Mr. Tarsih. These two gentlemen are considerably tough, supported by the fact that they have this extraordinary ability to eat very quickly. The crowds are now cheering as they are eager to see who is going to walk away with a blackberry in their hand. Even some of the young men place bets for the duel.
As the duel goes on, Mr. Darsono and Mr. Tarsih eat like madmen, with crumbs of cracker falling out of their mouth as they are munching on their crackers. Their mouths are crazily filled with crackers. While those mouths are full enough, they still insist on finishing the crackers all at once.
Finally, Mr. Darsono comes up as a winner.
His family cheers and so do his supporters. His wife cries in tears, sobbing in happiness "My dear hubby gets a fortune!" over and over again. Now it comes to a moment for Mr. Darsono to step up and gets his reward.
THE HOST: So, how do you feel, Mr. Darsono?
DARSONO: Full, of course, but this wouldn't mean nothing if it weren't of the blackberries
THE HOST: Before you receive your present, would you like to say a word? (like an acceptance speech)
DARSONO: Uh...first of all, I'd like to thank God for His blessing, then to my wife, children, and the whole neighborhood for supporting me. Thank you all.
*applause*
Mr. Darsono obviously can't wait to receive his reward. His eyes just need to get ready for it. Lots of box containing blackberries will soon appear before his sight. But the host keeps his curiosity grow even more.
THE HOST: And to whom would you like to share your blackberries to?
DARSONO: Um...uh...first my brother, in the city. He just lost his phone a week ago and I think, by giving him a blackberry will help him cope his problem. Then to my friends *gazing at his neighbors who are cheering at him*, I know you'll be expecting for this, and the last one, to my wife. This is also for you, darling.
*applause again*
THE HOST: Oh that's very generous of you. So, tell me, are you ready for them?
DARSONO: Yes, yes
THE HOST: Once again *raising his tone*, are you ready for it, sir?
DARSONO: (with voices of the crowd in the background) YES, YES....
THE HOST: Alllllrright...bring them in, boys!
The blackberries. They're here. Oh Lord, what did I dream last night? How could I be this lucky?
Some men step on to the stage, carrying something completely covered with a giant cloth. But no doubt anymore, something hidden inside the cloth is no other than the blackberries themselves. Lots of them!
THE HOST: Here are....what you've been waiting for.....the BLACKBERRIES!!
*applause and cheers*
The men unhesitatingly opened the cloth only to unveil a basket of small, dark fruits resembling grapes inside it.
*applause and cheers fade*
Mr. Darsono drops his jaw. Too speechless to speak anything. This is what he's been desiring about. This is what the whole neigborhood would kill for having. But apparently, they've expected too much, for it turns out nothing but the common fruits they've seen before.
THE HOST: *in a very loud voice, in contrast of the silent situation, where nobody speaks nor moves due to being extremely surprised* COOOOONGRATULATIONS Mr. Darsono. You're very lucky to receive this amazing reward, a basket of blackberries, courtesy of Mr. Suherman, who's kindly enough to contribute the fruits from his yard.
The whole field stays still in silence. Only the host's loud bariton voice fills the space. For nobody believes. They're not Blackberries, literally, they're REAL blackberries. Mr. Darsono is shaken and mixed with many emotions. Soon, he's going to share the fruits to the people he's promised to share them too. Nothing special about this.
Then, Mr. Darsono runs away from the stage while coughing, attempting throw up after devouring lots of cracker all at once. The crackers that are eaten, swallowed, but not digested well...wasted along with his hope.
Rest in peace, dear blackberry....
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