Compiled by Carissaseen through the eyes of the writer, heard through the ears of the writer
1. It's hard for girls to keep secrets.
Gossiping has always been girls' nature, no matter they swear not to do it or just not really into it. Face it girls, our gossiping level is much higher than guys' gossiping level, which implies that only a few guys like to do it. Say, if a friend of yours tells you a secret - let's say it's a HUGE thing, something extraordinary like she tells you that she is not straight; as in orientation, or her parent may have affairs - you'll definitely go. "Keep it a secret, okay? Just between you and me." Then you'll say. "Your secret is safe with me." But no, the truth is NO; well, unless you have some sort of an urge or determination that you will not ruin your best friend's reputation by spilling out the secret, or maybe...you're just different. That's all.
But without any exception, sooner or later, you'll feel uneasy for keeping such a HUGE secret, something not normal that a friend of yours have and you're the only one who knows about it. It's a nature too for someone not to spill something that has been kept for a long time and especially it's getting to make you feel uncomfortable for keeping something big and that if you spill it out, it's going to be a blast and yet makes a great effect to everyone, your community, and even to the owner of the secret her/himself.
Remember the story "King Midas"? When the king's barber discovers that the king obviously owns a pair of donkey's ears? The king tells him not to tell anyone, but the barber eventually feels uneasy for keeping such a huge secret. Therefore he decides to scream the truth out loud to a hole he digs because he can no longer keep it on his own, and really needs to speak it out. However, his words echo throughout the grass and the secret is later revealed.
If a friend asks you to keep a secret, no matter how huge it is and how bad you really want to speak it out, consider it more as a challenge, for keeping a secret will also judge how you're capable in keeping your mental strong.
Confession: with all of the fact that girls tend to find it hard to keep a huge secret, it also concludes that girls are the best informants ever, considering their or
our ability to spread news so quickly and has various networks. So if you accidentally spill a secret of your friend's out to another friend, and you tell her not to tell anyone, it's not going to work. You'll wake up tomorrow to find that the news you've told your friend not to tell anyone, has already been the best topic talked around the grounds.
2. Most Indonesians are not proud of their country
It's common for people to be proud of their country for sure. In an international gathering, whether it's a formal conference that unites people from different countries to a casual chat on internet forums, people will usually be asked about the country they're from. Some of them will not even hesitate to tell good things about the country, or even brag about them. They will usually use this opportunity to draw people's interest about the particular country they come from, some sort of promoting kind of activity. Or in another case, some people will be excited if they're asked to tell some information about the country they come from. They will go blabber about the good things; from nice places of interest, to friendly people, delicious cuisine, or high quality shopping goodies.
But it's different for Indonesians. Our country was once known for having such high nationalism owned by all citizens way back when. We used to be proud of our country! What else can't be bragged about? We got some nice diving sites, thick and dense rainforests, endangered species, isolated white sandy beaches, diverse community...and those are not enough to explain about Indonesia. If you trace back from the history, Indonesia is the only country in Asia which struggles for independence without the help of other countries, because the colonialists refuse to give us freedom back then. Finally in '45, our country gained independence, all by ourselves (let's give our high credits to the honored heroes).
Now, the situation is different. Time changes so fast, as well as the spirit of nationalism that begins to fade. Let's cut this short; I've met and heard so many people, if asked "Do you love Indonesia? Or are you proud of it?" They'll answer is just a simple: "November Oscar".
You ask. "Why? But I've heard so many great things about your country?" they'll answer. "What can we brag about? Oh yes, there's one: our country has possibly the cheekiest, smartest, most cunning people ever existed in this world. You call them corruptors and they even succeed to make our country reaching to the top 10 of the highest corruptions in the world. See? That's one big thing about our country right?"
But that ain't a good thing.
Then, you decide to ask another question aside from the corruption. "And I heard Indonesia has some good natural sites, like rainforests and sandy beach, volcanoes, and lakes." They'll say. "Yes, but they cut the trees off, possibly intending to turn the forests into a desert.
They also start to pluck some corals and kill the underwater ecosystem for their own business. The places of interests, such as for tourism purposes, like museums, they're not well treated. I've seen so many museums out of this country which has been maintained so well by the government, that they never lose visitors...
"Those museums out of Indonesia are extremely clean, updated, cutting-edge, with some technology touch. No wonder citizens in this country always refuse to go to the museum, because their appeal is not interesting enough. The government - I assume - don't really have the urge to attract more people into going to museums. All they do is just putting archaeological and historical items in rows and let them grow worn, dusty, and as if it's not a museum, but a place to sell antiques. I mean, they are items which have existed for hundreds or more years and keep valuable records about important events in the past, not some cheap antiques!!"
"A few more things," they'll continue. "You may say that Indonesians are friendly. Yes, they are, they really are. It's a fact, but let's say, if you're an Indonesian and one day you're lining up to get a scrambled egg for breakfast in an international hotel, and there's a foreigner lining up behind you, let's compare who gets the better service and hospitality by the cook. I've experienced that and the cook indeterminedly made the scrambled egg for me, and it tasted sour too. While a friend of mine disguised as a Thai, requesting for an egg in English. The cook assumed she must be a foreigner and hurriedly - and with a smile too - made a nicely, sweet, salty scrambled egg for her."
Then they'll go blabbering about some other bad stuffs of your country: the traffic jam, the pollution, how the public transportations are not well-maintained (which is obviously the reason why most Indonesians prefer to go by private vehicles or at least, cabs).
After listening to their long explanation, all the bad stuffs about Indonesia, you'll drop your jaw at once. Lastly, they'll conclude that. "Those are the reasons why Indonesia is STILL a developed country, with high level of poverty and some other poor things that should be taken care of."
Well, now from my point of view: I myself have a friend who's exactly like this. But believe me, 'they' doesn't refer to him. One day I ask her where he intends to continue his education to and he says that he wants to go to the X country, because it's a very nice, cutting-edge country...well, all the opposites of our country. Whether he intends to return to Indonesia, he refuses, saying that he'd rather be an immigrant and lives there instead of living an Indonesian.
That's a little too harsh , isn't it?
In my opinion, I'm actually deeply concerned about the current issues Indonesia is facing. There are lots of them, ranging from social (povertypovertypovertypoverty....), politics (the stupid, never-ending Bank Century issue), culture (the claim of our traditional values and culture by another country, and we just do nothing but protest, instead of preserving them for the future), and education (face it, despite the existence of international schools and the whole renewed, up to date curriculum, the education still has unfortunately poor curriculum system, and the worst is, there are fairly less free schools opened for the low class children).
Nuff said? Fine, I'll shut up here.
3. The most annoying question ever. "What rank do you get at school?"
Really, all adults expect all children they meet to be smart. This is a very stereotypical mindset. When you go to a gathering with your parents and you meet some fellow adults (friends of your parents), this question will always come up. Once or twice, that's fine, but if you keep getting that kind of question, trust me, it will begin to irritate you sooner or later.
Ranks always symbolize cleverness, like a badge pinned to one's shirt. Without the badge, the person is nothing. It really determines your position. Same thing as ranks. If you don't get a rank but you're smart, you're STILL nothing for the adults. Rank is still the most valuable thing a child ever has according to the adults (seen from the point of view of a child), your dignity. One thing they don't know: not all smart people can always get the 'badges'.
4. Parents stalk their children through Networking Sites.
You'll find this as one of five top reasons of why parents start to open up accounts on networking sites. Yes, they do want to experience what the younger generations are crazy about. Curiosity. That's the key. Soon parents will begin to find the advantage of using networking sites; which is to find old friends and greet them through cyber world.
But then, they'll find another advantage too. Parents, no matter what, are protective towards their kids and always, ALWAYS curious about what their kids are up to. So it won't be much a surprise if you find your mother suddenly calling you from her office, demanding to tell her who you just added to your friend's list a few minutes ago, just because your mom doesn't recognize the person you just added your friend's list.
In conclusion, networking site is NOT (again, I emphasize NOT) a safe place to chat with your friends about how annoying your parents are. They're watching over, somewhere...out there...
Anyway, let's take a look at the bright side. It's always parents' instinct to be protective towards their children and know what exactly they're up too. This may sound annoying to us all, but remember the cases of two different girls managing to meet the strangers they met on a social network and ended up being raped? Those actions (the whole conversation and interaction with the strangers) were taken without the knowledge of their parents!
So if one day your mom calls you immediately only to ask who you just added to your friends' list, it's all done for your sake and safety *hugegrin*
5. English is no longer a "SAFE" language
Face it, English has been an international language since like, years ago. And it's not a surprise anymore if you go to a foreign place outside your country, then you get lost, and the only communication you can use is by speaking English. English has been one of the most important subjects at school and has been taught since we were like...6. Okay, if your kindergarten didn't teach you English, your parents will probably send you out to join an English course or foundation just to increase your English skills.
But now, you think that only high society are able to speak and understand English, that other kind of societies aren't given knowledge in speaking English. Usually, if you want to talk about someone in his/her presence, without being discovered, English is your way of communicating. You just have to talk normally with a friend of yours right next to you, but both of you talk about the person you're currently spotting at.
For example, say you're on a bus and a man sitting right across you have a weird beard that you can't hold for not telling it to your friend sitting next to you. The safest way is to talk to a friend of yours using English, thus, the man won't know what you're talking about (despite you're talking about his funny beird). Or if you're in the classroom, in the middle of Bahasa Indonesia lesson. The teacher is being annoying, and you just can't help to curse her, but in English. Thus, she won't know that the high tone you're using is actually a curse directed to her.
That was yesterday. But today, English is NO longer a "SAFE" language, considering free English education starts to spread in the town, teaching students ranging from street urchins to beggars. That's a good thing actually! Because English is a language of globalization, that proves one's intelligence. Even teachers at school (no matter English teachers or not) start to be given English lessons. So, start not to talk about your teacher or anyone else sitting across you or even the bus conductor in English, they might now.
P.S: Not just English, but it seems, Japanese will follow English as the second "no longer safe" language to write and talk about. So if you're writing a memo to a friend in an English class, using Japanese hiragana, and your teacher catches your act and says. "Wow, you learn Japanese TOO?" Please pay attention that "TOO" here is a dangerous keyword, that indicates if that if you learn it TOO, it means, the teacher refers that she can also...understand Japanese.
The next thing you know, you're so dead and you'll be sent to the principal's office for writing in foreign language about your teacher - the foreign language which the teacher understands. Language is a key of communication, and you must be careful in using it, especially in this case.
6. Good things always come to an end
Theoretically, if you're just getting used to something or someone, you'll lose it immediately. So don't get all used to something, because once you're getting used to it so quickly, you'll lose it sooner or later.
7. When you tell people about your dislikes, they'll bring them up just to irritate and make fun of you.
Really, you see this on TV very lately. There is this variety show where the host invites a celebrity to do some challenges. When it comes to a challenge which features something that the celebrity hates, or worst - her phobia, say like she's afraid of spiders (arachnophobia) - the host cheekily manages to scare her by swinging the spider towards her. Phobia IS a serious thing. Don't try to mess up with it, even though some people don't take phobia seriously. They think it's only a common thing that is disliked and scared by some particular people.
Then you see the celebrity jumps out immediately upon seeing the host runs after her, swinging the spider at her. The celebrity makes a hysterical response, jumping up and down, hiding here and there. At a glance, it may seem funny but really, it's a serious thing. The celebrity isn't acting when it comes to such serious things like phobia.
Another example, you see some balloons hanging near you. Your friend picks a balloon up but she doesn't know you're scared of them (some phobias may sound ridiculous). Then you tell her that you don't like balloons because hey freak you out. Knowing your weakness, your friend starts to think that it may be funny to see you freaked out. Then, she starts to swing the balloons right at you.
I just watched a movie called An Education this afternoon, starring Carey Mulligan and Peter Sarsgaard. It's a good movie, with good moral at the end of the story. So the movie tells about a 16 year-old girl, Jenny, who stumbles upon a 30 something year-old man and is later smitten by him. Jenny finds herself torn between two worlds, where in one side she is actually still an innocent student herself who has the common ambition as what other teenagers have - which is to graduate and go to a dream university - while in the other side, his love interest - David - introduces her to the world of adults and glam.
But without any exception, sooner or later, you'll feel uneasy for keeping such a HUGE secret, something not normal that a friend of yours have and you're the only one who knows about it. It's a nature too for someone not to spill something that has been kept for a long time and especially it's getting to make you feel uncomfortable for keeping something big and that if you spill it out, it's going to be a blast and yet makes a great effect to everyone, your community, and even to the owner of the secret her/himself.
Then you see the celebrity jumps out immediately upon seeing the host runs after her, swinging the spider at her. The celebrity makes a hysterical response, jumping up and down, hiding here and there. At a glance, it may seem funny but really, it's a serious thing. The celebrity isn't acting when it comes to such serious things like phobia.